ZEPPOLE
Zeppole
A Love Story
Fiction by Joseph Bathanti • Illustration by Mariano Santillan
My mother swears she’s pregnant. She wants to cook. Which she never does. In our house, my father handles the cooking. As recently as yesterday she wasn’t even speaking to us, but this baby — the baby, she says — has her happy and she wants to make zeppole. Little patties of dough fried in hot olive oil, then sprinkled with sugar. She has a craving. The way her mother used to make them. I don’t remember ever eating them, but my mother assures me I have. At my grandmother’s. But we hardly see her anymore, and I’m not certain I’d recognize her if she crashed through the roof.
My mother produces a white prayer book with a tiny lock like an antique diary’s. With a key the size of an infant’s thumbnail she opens it. Should she drop to her knees, mumbling antiphonies like those insane Calabrian widows on Good Fridays at the graveyard, I will fall over dead in astonishment, and my father will join me. But she does not pray. Rather, she takes from the prayer book’s withered secret pages a slip of frayed paper and, reading from it as she puffs on a Chesterfield, assembles the grayish-yellow mound of dough.
My father sits reading the obituaries at the kitchen table. Wearing a long white terrycloth robe with a black hex sign on the back, he looks like a prizefighter. He tells my mother that Philly Decker died and is laid out at Febraro’s.
“Did somebody shoot him or did he just eat himself to death?” she asks.
“Doesn’t mention,” says my dad.
“I thought he was too in love with himself to die. How will the world keep spinning?”
“I think we should go see him, Rita.”
“You go. I never liked him, but please tell him I said hello.”
“Your mother has no respect for the dead, Fritz,” he says to me. “Or for the living.”
He gets up and takes the newspaper into the living room. I follow him, lie on my stomach on the floor with the comics and doze off. As I sleep, the dough, hunkered in a glass bowl covered with a tea towel, miraculously doubles in size.
When I wake, I walk toward the kitchen. My mother, in a pink summer nightgown, stands at the ironing board running the steaming wedge back and forth across the collar of the black dress she’ll wear to work. The iron occasionally hisses. From the radio, volume hiked way up, Elvis Presley, in a whispery voice, sings “I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You.”
She sings along as she irons, fervently, churchy, then sways, guided by Elvis over the dance floor of dream. She has not noticed me. There are tears in her eyes. Behind her, like excelsior, sun sprays the window, silhouetting her, the gown chiseled in relief, her hair spun at her crown in filigrees, her face a marbled shadow of backlight out of which drifts a disembodied yearning not clearly my mother’s. And for that instant I am blinded and do not see until the sun flares off the Pentecostal flames from the ignited oil in the skillet raging behind her.
“Mom,” I scream. She looks up surprised and smiles, still singing unabashedly: Take my hand, take my whole life too.
Then she turns and sees the fire licking at her. She grabs the wooden skillet handle. The flames leap from the skillet to her gown, pour over it like liquid, and she is instantly engulfed. The music like requiem, Elvis Presley like the cantor at High Mass looping incense over his mesmerized flock as the church burns down. I can’t move. I can’t take my eyes off her, no longer my mother, like sacred art restored, an angel wedding fire.
My father storms by me and scoops up my mother. He kicks open the screen door. There is an audible suspiration as he too catches fire, stumbling down the three concrete steps to the yard where he drops her, still clutching the spouting skillet, in my swimming pool, then simply steps out of his fiery robe and leaps in the water beside her.
The pool has sat in the little yard all winter. Leaves float on its surface. Neighborhood dogs drink out of it. The blue plastic bottom, patterned with yellow cartoon fish with long-lashed eyes and huge puckered lips, is slick with algae. The round aluminum frame is caving.
Unharmed, my mother and father sit next to each other in the pool. Laughing. She in what’s left of the charred pink gown. Bit by bit it falls off her body and floats on the water like scraps of flesh. My father is naked. Together they splash water on his burning robe until the flames die down, and there is the sodden smell of fried terrycloth, the nubs at the end of each thread brown on white like blackened marshmallows.










