TEA LEAF ASTROLOGER

You know that shameless party guest who just can’t stop with the eggnog? Darling, you are the eggnog. Rich, indulgent and best in small doses, most folks simply don’t know how to handle you. This month kicks off with a Sagittarius New Moon conjunct a retrograde Mercury in Sagittarius (read: you’re going to feel tipsy). Wait until December 5 to dive into that new project you’re all charged up about. Success may take a while, but the seeds you plant now will take root.

Tea leaf “fortunes” for the rest of you:

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

The gift isn’t always obvious.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Don’t leave before the second act.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Make friends with your color palette.

Aries (March 21 – April 19) 

Look under the couch.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Cut the fluff.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Invest in wool socks.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Double dog dare you to care less.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Two words: sugared cranberries.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Tacky is as tacky does.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Go for the upgrade.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Prepare to dazzle yourself.